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Placebo Gazette #126

(Keeping Our Finger On The Prostate Of Medicine)
 
5/1/09


Field their not in database

  1. The Question That Will Never Be Asked
  2. A Flu By Any Other Name
  3. Conjuring Up A Conspiracy
  4. Placebo Journal Update!
  5. A Modest Proposal by Michael Gorback MD
  6. Class Warfare
  7. Pissing Money Away
  8. Pay For Drug Performance
  9. Legalizing Marijuana by Michael Gorback MD
  10. Another Government Double Standard?
  11. Shitter: The Social Messaging Service For IBS Patients
  12. Feedback About The Placebo Gazette

 

1. The Question That Will Never Be Asked


If you haven't heard, a federal agent who traveled to Mexico with President Obama this month probably contracted swine flu and infected several members of his family. The agent's family members are among the nine probable cases authorities have identified in Maryland. The only medicine working for this virus is Tamiflu or Relenza. As an aside, this was one of the few years that the regular flu did NOT respond to treatment via these medications. Coincidence? Conspiracy? Probably not, but I will give you one better. We are not supposed to prophylactically take these meds to protect ourselves from getting the H1NI flu, however, do you think the president has taken them now that one of his federal agents contracted this illness? Admitting this would send everyone to their doctors for scripts and woudl cause a huge run on the medication. I want someone from the press corp to ask and see what happens. Just for sh#ts and giggles.

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2. A Flu By Any Other Name
 


U.S. public health officials have dropped the term "swine flu" in favor of "2009 H1N1 flu" because they are concerned that the term "swine flu" is hurting pork sales. The funny thing is that even if this virus was 100% swine flu, you couldn't get it from eating pork. I guess the government doesn't think we are smart enough to realize that and they are beholden to the pig lobbyists. Here is a better one - the Israeli Deputy Health Minister Yakov Litzman, a member of the ultra-religious United Torah Judaism Party, this week urged changing the name to "Mexican flu," because swine are not kosher. What? This is getting crazy. Since we are all playing the name changing game, why not call it:

  • "The Other White Meat" Flu
  • "Porky Pig Flu"
  • "And This Little Piggy Went All Across The Globe" Flu
  • "Oink Vey" Flu
  • "Hogs and Kisses" Flu

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3. Conjuring Up A Conspiracy



 

Obama is going to pass a big budget soon. Huge. Arlen Specter switched from political party he has been with since the Hoover administration in order to save his career. This gives the democratic party a filibuster proof stronghold. This is as close to absolute power as this country can get. Someone once reminded me that "absolute power corrupts absolutely". The government is starting to own the banks, the auto industry, the stock market and the healthcare system. Big things are coming down the pike within weeks that will shake this country's foundation. Doesn't anyone else think that this whole "swine flu" epidemic is a conspiracy to cover all this up? Come on, it is in every paper and causing widespread fear. Obama wants another $1.5 billion for a confirmed 65 cases. This is an obvious scam for Obama to cover up his real motives.
 
Am I crazy? Am I being facetious? Sarcastic? Flippant? Sure I am but why is this conspiracy idea any less valid than all those Bush conspiracy ideas when he was president? I remember the web and even television commentators putting forth idiotic ideas how the Bush administration would divert the country's attention from the war or Katrina or whatever. It's all perspective depending on what you want to see. For me, I want to see if I can start the first Obama conspiracy rumor.

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4. Placebo Journal Update
 

 

We have started to work hard on the next issue in order to keep the laughs coming.   We consisently are told that our journal is the only one read cover-to-cover.  Isn't time you found your smile again?  We have the answer and it comes right to your house every other month.  If you want something that is all humor and guaranteed to make you a little incontinent then:

 


I wish to propose the following process before Congress takes up the issue of national heath care:
 
For one year, members of Congress must use the nearest VA for all non-emergency care. Any doctor or facility other than the VA will be out of network. If they choose to go out of network they must report what treatment they had and why they elected not to go to the nearest VA hospital. Let them have a taste of the future they are molding for us.
 
While we're at it, make Obama, his wife, and his kids go to the VA for medical care so he gets a good dose of it too.

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Even the NY Times is writing about the need for more primary care doctors. Even more unbelievable and exciting is that the government is on board with this as well. Most people agree that if you give millions of patients health insurance, they are going to use it and are going to need to have doctors to see them. This didn't work out so well in Massachussetts. Primary care docs are in shortage already and this is even before any reform happens. Like it or not, the big reason for the shortage is pay. There is an unfair disparity of what family docs get compensated for compared to what some specialists get compensated for. That disparity is going to lead to a internal fight between physicians and that is going to be ugly. Before I go on, I want to define that term "disparity" for many of my readers. I agree that a neurosurgeon, who has a seven-year residency program, deserves to get paid more than I do as a family doc. In fact, I am not saying we should be all paid the same, by any means. But for a dermatologist to get paid three to four times what a primary doc gets is ridiculous. The article brings up the term "budget neutral" and the specialists not wanting to be part of that. Trust me, this internal strife is going to make the arguments amongst us physicians look like the arguments you see on the show Real Housewives of New York City. I am so embarassed to admit I actually have seen that show.

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Knome, the company known for gene sequencing, is offering to personally read your DNA if you win their auction on eBay. The opening bid is $68K which is much lower than the $350K that they were charging just last year to determine the sequence of virtually all 6 billion chemical units of DNA in a person’s 46 chromosomes. I guess you can file this publicity stunt under the section of "who gives a crap" because no one even knows what to do with the information. My favorite part of the article explained how the company is throwing in a bonus to help attract bidders — a private dinner with George Church, a prominent Harvard scientist who co-founded Knome. I want to be first to go on record and say that I would rather have dinner with the gnome from the Travelocity commercials.

 

 

I WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK.  Please go to each individual story and follow the link.  If you do not have access to the blog you can also post your thoughts under the WRITE A REVIEW section.   

 

Until next time, keep smiling, keep laughing and keep out of the sample closet.

Doug

King of Medicine   

 

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